Symptoms: Aversion to grease, lackluster appetite, feelings of apathy.
Diagnosis: Boring burger burnout (BBB).
Treatment: Butcher & the Burger, a nostalgia-themed Lincoln Park shop that opened yesterday.
Notes: Chef Al Sternweiler (Duchamp) partners with local farmers to deliver fresh, lean cuts and customized patties.
Choose your base: meat (Wagyu grass-fed beef, bison), poultry (free-range turkey), seafood (shrimp, wild salmon), or veggie. Add your favorite seasoning (Chicago Steakhouse, curry coconut). Top it all off with high-end extras (blue cheese, foie gras, black truffle aioli).
A firm believer in using every part of the animal, Sternweiler sells daily cuts (pork chops, sausage) from the shop’s vintage icebox. Starting next week, you can call ahead and Sternweiler and company will have a meat loaf or roast chicken ready for dinnertime pickup.
Post-Treatment Rehab (Coming Soon): Breakfast burgers, Cafe du Monde beignets, and hands-on butchery classes.
It’s straight ill.
Butcher & the Burger, 1021 West Armitage Avenue, at Kenmore Avenue (773-697-3735 or butcherandtheburger.com).
Photo: Andersen Ross / Getty Images