January 24, 2007

Wake Up and Smell the Compliments

Stephen Fry Alarm Clock

WC v. john, biscuit v. cookie, lumpy v. fat.

It’s official. When Brits say it, it just sounds better.

Take the Stephen Fry alarm clock, a quirky invention from across the pond. While we Americans rely on the radio, they wake up to this: “Good morning, sir. The prime minister phoned again. I told him you were not available. We shan’t be treated like that again!” (Howard Stern just isn’t as charming.)

Programmed with 50 deeply fortifying messages, the clock provides what we all crave: unearned admiration. Which, to be frank, only a machine is truly capable of. Before you hit the sack at night, press a button to hear a relaxation exercise: “Now it’s time for sir to sleep. We relax, do we not? Counting from ten …”

A “madam” version will be available this spring, so we can all wake up on the right side of the bed. Which sounds lovely.

Any way you say it.

Available online at voco.uk.com.