Chicago - February 26, 2007

Rub It In

At-Home Massage and Tan

Oh, to be a dude. Higher pay, no PMS, and, ahem, happy endings.

Gross? Maybe. Unfair? Definitely. We ladies burned our bras for equality, and sometimes we still feel like we got the short end of the stick, so to speak.

Well, not anymore. Meet Kelly Gaffner, a massage therapist who finishes off house calls with a happy ending all her own: a post-massage rubdown with bronzing cream.

Trained in Swedish, deep tissue, myofascial, and neuromuscular therapy massage, Gaffner spends 60 to 90 minutes working out your kinks. When she’s done, she bronzes you (Goldfinger-style) from head to toe. All this in the comfort of your own home.

Gaffner charges the same price as spas around town, so it’s totally worth it. You’ll feel tan, rested, and ready for just about anything.

Which sounds more like an auspicious beginning.

Kelly Gaffner (312-545-6670 or kmgaffner@yahoo.com).

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