It’s not that you don’t enjoy foreplay. It’s just that your job ends at 5. And overtime isn’t your thing.
The BF, however, is a total workaholic (if you know what we mean).
Reciprocate already and sign up for a Blow Job class at G Boutique. We promise it won’t suck or bite. (And by the end of the hour, neither will you.) If all goes well, you’ll learn saucy moves in a safe environment. At the very least, it’s fodder for gossip at the neighborhood watch meeting.
Burning questions come first (to lube or not to lube?), followed by Hand Jobs 101 (they’re back!), where you’ll learn everything from Old Faithful to Knob Polisher. Then on to shocking his pants off with moves like Gummer, Hummer, and Laplander.
Clearly, this class was made for bachelorette parties, though you can take one whenever you have an aching jaw. Sessions fill up fast, so sign up ASAP.
And don’t blow it.
G Boutique, 2131 North Damen Avenue, between Webster and Armitage Avenues (773-235-1234 or boutiqueg.com).