Broccoli: I’m lonesome. No one wants to eat me.
Green bean: Whatever, dude. I might as well be chopped liver.
Chopped liver: Speak for yourself, skinny. I’m totally cool, thanks to Kiddy Cuisine Consulting Services. Founded by chefs, the company gives tips on how to introduce foods to kids.
Green bean: All this over e-mail and phone?
Chopped liver: Sure. But if parents want more help, consultants can design weekly menus or even teach them how to prepare meals.
Broccoli: Well, it must be good if they can work magic for nasties like you.
Chopped liver: Bite me.
Kiddy Cuisine Consulting Services (312-405-8212 or kiddycuisine.com).
The Paul Green School of Rock All-Stars
What: Teen musicians play Aerosmith, The Beatles, Zeppelin, and more.
Why: Keep on rockin’ in the wee world.
When: Sat., 5:30 p.m.
Where: Martyrs’ Restaurant & Pub, 3855 N. Lincoln Ave., b/t Byron & Grace Sts. (773-404-9494). Tickets online at musictoday.com.
Cirque Dreams Jungle Fantasy
What: Aerialists, contortionists, and acrobats journey through an enchanted jungle.
Why: It’s where the wild things are.
When: Wed., Fri. & Dec. 31, 7:30 p.m.; Thurs. & Sat., 1 & 7:30 p.m.; Sun., 1 & 6:30 p.m.
Where: The Chicago Theatre, 175 N. State St., at Randolph St. Tickets at 312-902-1500 or online at ticketmaster.com.
Mayor Daley’s Holiday Sports Festival
What: Free use of a huge indoor gym with trampolines, golf, football, bowling, table tennis, badminton, boxing, and lots more.
Why: Junior’s got game.
When: Fri.-Sun., 10 a.m.-4 p.m.
Where: McCormick Place, Halls a & b, 2301 S. Martin Luther King Dr., at Lake Shore Dr. (312-744-3315).