You Can Bet on It

las vegas!

They don’t call it Sin City for nothing.

All-male revue? Pass. Temptation lies at Crystals, CityCenter’s new shopping district (“mall” doesn’t do it justice). Even if you get past Assouline or the guacamole at Beso, you don’t have a chance at Kiki de Montparnasse: The purveyor of elegant erotica’s third location features the boutique’s first jewelry bar, portrait booth, and couples’ dressing room.

While Downtown Cocktail Room’s Mixology Monday shows you just how much more there is to know about the spirits, the view from Twist by Pierre Gagnaire or Mandarin Bar on the 23rd floor is humbling. (A midparty manicure and makeup touch-up inside the ladies room at Vanity qualifies as a necessity.)

Lazy? No way. You walked all the way from your Palazzo suite to the Bouchon Bakery for a carrot cake cookie. Now if you lose track of time (and gravity) in the Canyon Ranch SpaClub wave room or fall asleep plunge poolside after the ancient cane ritual scrub and massage at Reliquary Water Sanctuary & Spa, then you might have a problem.

The only way to avoid excess is to share. A challenge when faced with the Carnevino beef tasting menu, Society Cafe Encore mac ’n’ cheese bites, or the ticking truffle-dispensing chocolate clock at Payard. Though the two-ounce pours of bubbly at Laguna Champagne Bar are all you.

A guest bedroom in the all-suite, LEED Gold-certified, no-gaming, smoke-free Vdara hotel? A gift every night with turndown service in your loft at Hotel 32 on top of the Monte Carlo? An extra lap of the Las Vegas Motor Speedway in the Aston Martin with Exotics Racing? Really, how generous.

It’s hard not to boast about your Papillon helicopter tour and champagne lunch at the Grand Canyon. Or your personal relationship with Valentino Crespo, master butler extraordinaire. Or your basketball-size Frrrozen Hot Chocolate at Serendipity 3. All you can do is your best.

Don’t blame that nice dealer. That valet had nothing to do with it. The only person you have to be mad at is yourself. Remember this feeling the next time you book such an early flight home.

Photo: Olivander / Flickr