We’re pretty sure the liar who said, “Don’t worry! Breast-feeding melts off the pounds” is the same person who said, “Don’t worry! Your maternal instinct will kick right in.”

Our suggestion: While nursing off that extra padding, pop in a copy of Baby’s Home … What Now? The new DVD takes all the advice, tips, and facts you need for the first three months and synthesizes it into manageable chapters.

Calling on experienced parents and a panel of experts (an ob-gyn, pediatric nurse, sex therapist, and postpartum consultant), it bravely ventures into territory your friends with kids forgot to share (sleepless nights, messy postpartum recovery, sex after childbirth).

And though the DVD won’t give you all the answers, it does arm you with enough knowledge to feel confident in your new role as mom. Which is the weight off you really need.

Available online at babyshomedvd.com, $25.

YEE HAW
Christmas at Stockyards Station
What: Santa gets dressed in cowboy duds, plus face painting.
Why: Snap priceless shots of Saint Nick in dude ranch-worthy gear.
When: Sat. Santa, noon-2 p.m.; face painting, 12:30-3:30 p.m.
Where: 130 E. Exchange Ave., Fort Worth (817-625-9715).

GLIMMER
Holiday Trail of Lights
What: Bundle up and take a stroll through the colorful display.
Why: Live music banishes any bit of bah humbug behavior.
When: Fri.-Sun., 6:30-9 p.m.
Where: The Heard Natural Science Museum & Wildlife Sanctuary, 1 Nature Pl., McKinney (972-562-5566). Tickets online at heardmuseum.org. Adults and teens, $6 in advance/$7 at the door; children 3-12, $4 in advance/$5 at the door; under 3, free.

GET MERRY
Country Christmas
What: Story time with Mrs. Claus, hayrides, and a petting zoo.
Why: Wander through the tricky candy cane maze.
When: Sat., 10 a.m.-5 p.m; Sun., 1-5 p.m. Gates close at 4 p.m.
Where: Country Critters Farm, 3709 County Rd. 617, Alvarado (817-477-3060). Adults and children, $7.

Photo: Courtesy of Parents and Experts, LLC