October 19, 2001

Excuse Me While I Kiss This Guy

KissThisGuy.com, the archive of misheard kareoke lyrics

Spotlight.

You.

Until the brilliance of the karaoke monitor. Glammed up. You’ve practiced your do-re-mi’s. The crowd is cheering. You feel the love. But, um, you don’t know the words.

It’s okay. We’ve all been busted. (Heck, we think “Sweet dreams are maitre d’s” is a better line than the Eurythmics one, anyway.)

In New York, such a faux pas might fly. (It might even get you a date!). But In L.A., where singing in the supermarket could mean your next big break, knowing the right words is paramount. Angelenos hit the liner notes before grabbing the mike at Brass Monkey (3440 Wilshire; 213-381-7047), the karaoke lounge for those with a song in their heart and a few shots of booze in their veins.

Karaoke kids, do your homework. Check out KissThisGuy.com, the archive of misheard lyrics, named, of course, after the similar-sounding Jimi Hendrix lyric from “Purple Haze.”

Our fave? “I’ll never be your beast of burden” Vs. “I’ll never leave your pizza burnin.”

That’s almost as good as “The girl with kaleidoscope eyes” becoming “The girl with colitis goes by…”