Once upon a time (like, yesterday) there lived a beautiful princess, who traveled to a land far, far away (horrors, the mall) in search of a onesie for her tot.

When did baby shopping turn into a nightmarish bedtime story? You know, the one where you’re the Damsel in Distress and the shopgirls are the Evil Stepsisters. The plotline is a three-act play: difficult sizes, uninspired lines, and snot-nosed, screaming, spoiled brats. (And those are just the parents.)

Turn the page and check out Speesees, Rachel Pearson’s collection of adorable tees, kimonos, caps, and impossibly cute bodysuits. Not only are they eco-friendly and buttery soft, but they also introduce Junior to the planet’s treasures. Each garment comes accented with an adorable creature, like a sea horse, an elephant, a giraffe, or others. The cotton, of course, is chemical- and pesticide-free.

Shopping nightmare avoided. You live happily ever after.

Available online at speesees.com.