Not Your Average Joe

Your oven may as well be a storage locker. Your microwave’s clock has been flashing twelve o’clock for two years now. And your pantry houses your well-curated shoe collection.

In other words, the sight of it all would have Betty Crocker rolling over in her grave.

Fret not: There is a glimmer of hope. The FrancisFrancis! X5 espresso machine is colorful, compact, and resembles a work of art, but Illy USA’s piece de resistance is also functional, rated number one by restaurateurs and coffeemakers worldwide. (Your beans stirring yet?) The membership program (which gets you the X5 for $174, instead of $630) comes with a gorgeous Jeff Koons cappuccino collection, designed to give you more than just a caffeine buzz.

Perfect for you to stare at while you’re unpacking that Chinese takeout.

Available online at illyusa.com.