Food & Drink

Allergic Retraction

On the sympathy scale of 1-10, 1 being “cry me a river” and 10 being “wow, that totally blows,” each allergy has its place:

Ragweed: 5 (Used to be 7, but Claritin’s over-the-counter now.)
Peanuts: 8 (Just a jelly sandwich, thanks.)
Garlic: -10 (who are these people kidding?)
Gluten: 1,000 (code red)

What’s a victim to do? Get Happy. Manhattan’s adorable Lower East Side bakery Happy Happy Happy specializes in the art of baking without gluten, dairy, yeast, hydrogenated fats, or preservatives — and they’ve finally launched a website.

This means that a lactose-intolerant, wheat-allergic someone with a sweet tooth can still enjoy a vanilla-frosted cupcake or mocha tart; an aspiring Proust with a tricky tummy can delight in a Madeleine; and gluten-phobes can tuck into milk and cookies before bed (the coffee-toffee offering is pretty darn good, even if you can handle the Tollhouse variety).

For that small, tortured percentage of society that thought they’d never hear the following words, we merrily say to you: “Let them eat cake.”

Chocolate allergy? Get out the big knife. There’s no point in going on.

Available online at happyhappyhappy.com.