Clubland is frightening. The crowds, the velvet rope, the nntch-nntch-nntch of the bass line. The crowds.

Yet, the genuine article — say, a high-energy Ibiza import — is sometimes just what you need. Even as it’s just what you fear.

International nightclub Pacha (pronounced PAH-sha, as in the Turkish term for “regal big cheese”) officially opens its 26th outpost tonight in the old Sound Factory space. (Really now, Lithuania before Manhattan?)

It’s a club even an agoraphobe could love. And, in keeping with the spirit of Gotham nightlife circa fall 2005, there’s a semi-secret, VIP-only lounge called Pachita on the top floor of the three-level behemoth.

Pachita is where you’ll find the usual array of uber lounge accoutrements, like high-concept design and low bottle-strewn banquettes. With some rather fine Euro adjustments: They’ll store unfinished bottles for your return visits. (No need to down all $200 of that Level in one sitting.) For the ladies, the finest bathrooms — and bathroom goodies — we’ve seen.

Owner/celeb DJ Erick Morillo has installed VIP perks up the wazoo. Our fave: the Pacha Passport, which grants you access to all Pacha clubs worldwide. Only about 500 of these babies are being distributed, so get on the horn with your publicist.

High impact, sure. But sometimes you have to put your worst fears aside and live a little.

Pachita, 618 West 46th Street, top floor, between Eleventh and Twelfth Avenues (212-209-7500).