Last Sunday, we popped into Knife + Fork, a charming East Village restaurant that recently opened with none of the usual fanfare, publicity, or 900-seat hijinks. May as well support a new neighbor. Especially a quiet one.

Two dishes into the prix fixe menu (a bargain at $45 for six courses), Fats McGimmegimme bellowed, “Okay, Blabbermouth. What’s it going to take for you not to write about this place?”

“Yeah,” Stingy La Rue continued, polishing off a medallion of salmon with an herb crust. “We want this one to ourselves. We don’t want this place crawling with the hoi polloi. As soon as they show up, we’ll never be able to get this excellent nook in the back again.”

“Besides,” Fats droned on, “you really think they’ll appreciate the tea tomato consommé? Or saffron-poached pineapple and foie gras? Or curry-dusted skate and lavender-rubbed duck breast?”

“Not that we don’t want good things for the chef,” S.L.R. conceded over apple-fennel parfait. “He seems like a nice Irish guy. And he’s cooked in impressive kitchens around the world. Still. Can’t you just shut up for once?”

Well now.

In a word? No.

Knife + Fork, 108 East 4th Street, between First and Second Avenues (212-228-4885).