Once you were relatively sane. You could choose flowers with aplomb, dress yourself without melting down. Then you started planning a wedding — and your mental stability began slowly to erode. Stop the insanity: Help is on the way.

Explore the Unconscious
The whole point of the day is to have fun. Help everyone relax by calling Drink Event Bartending (415-702-5431). The company creates exotic, customized cocktails using fresh figs and kaffir lime leaves, as well as updating classics like bourbon with house-made vanilla sugar and a sprig of thyme.

Write of Passage
Unite your irrational need for romance and your pragmatic desire for ladylike propriety with invites from Cat Seto (2406 Polk Street, 415-753-2909). A personalized, hand-drawn map from Stephannie Barba gives people no excuse to skip the ceremony. And the Mission-based illustrator can even print it on a tote bag as a party favor.

Crossing the Threshold
Hypnotize your guests with a mesmerizing view of the Bay Bridge from the rooftop of Hotel Vitale (8 Mission Street, 415-278-3711). Trust that coordinator Grace Lee will bring every last present back to your house. Or if you’d rather get out of town, let Alison Hotchkiss (2200 Broderick Street, 415-567-7605) plan a bang-up destination wedding.

Ego Gratification
Indulge the fantasy of a princess dress from Jin Wang (111 Maiden Lane, 3rd floor; 415-397-9111) and a pair of dainty satin heels from Blue Tux Shoes to prance down the aisle.

The Undiscovered Self
Don’t let neurosis get the better of you. Nik and her crackerjack team of hair and makeup artists at About Face International will have your face looking flawless. Tracey Yuen is another good bet for less coin.

Avoid Peony Envy
Your inner child wants one of every flower you can dream up. Instead, have Leah Gagné and Rafael Campos at Spiral Hand Floral + Event Design (523 Pierce Street, 415-552-3032) create unique sculptural centerpieces. If your budget is petite (or you’re a total control freak), make a Saturday out of one of Nancy Liu Chin’s DIY wedding flower workshops (1095 Tennessee Street, 415-647-2012). One course focuses on centerpieces, pew decor, and cocktail pieces, while the other centers on bouquets, corsages, and boutonnieres.

Feed the Hysteria
Put a lid on Cousin Maude’s GMO-phobia by bringing in Rising Sun Catering to create a stunning, locally grown NorCal feast. Don’t have an in with Thomas Keller? Componere Catering (510-420-0900) creates French Laundry-style extravaganzas. Get creative and serve up chocolate-dipped oatmeal cookie ice cream sandwiches from Oakland’s longstanding It’s It.

Face the Music
Half your guests are a little bit country, and the other half are die-hard rock and roll — so let the California Cowboys (707-425-2774) stir up a foot-stompin’, rollickin’ good time. Otherwise, let Gramps get psychosexual with playlists by uber-DJ David Carvalho.

Hooray for Selective Memory
After the food’s been eaten, the music’s over, and the guests are gone, all that will remain are the photos. So make sure they’re good by using a photographer from The Short List. For an extra-special memory, let Loop (415-517-0300) create an original, ten-to-fifteen-minute documentary to celebrate your story. Each one requires six weeks of interviews, research, and editing to complete.

So you can both tap into the memory of your special day without having it subject to interpretation.

Still feeling a little neurotic? Check out our spring 2006 wedding guide for more tips.