Gift him with prezzies he actually needs this year. Sheesh.

Chubby Hubby
Big Man breaks a sweat only when watching a close game. Set the score straight with a Crazy Cruizer, a manual scooter that burns big-time calories with a fun workout similar to rollerblading. Or hit Mockingbird Station’s new Index Skateboard Supply so he can board off the bulge. And there’s always a pass to Preston Hollow’s new Equinox, which opens December 21.

Clothes Course
Wardrobe is not his strong suit. First step: Slix, a new Dallas brand that makes performance boxer briefs, socks, and undershirts that are comfy (no tags!) and wicks away moisture. At checkout, plug in code DC20 for 20 percent off through December 31. Next hit new Highland Park Village shop Hadleigh’s for everything from bespoke men’s suits and shirts to house label cashmere ties (by appointment only).

A Lush Order
Work has him a hermit. Loosen things up with a private table and bottle service at trendy new lounge Deux. Or play it safe at home with an engraved bottle of Johnnie Walker Blue Label or personalized vino from Vintage Wines available in as little as 48 hours.

The Bulk
Add some meat to those bones with Tillman’s Roadhouse’s new rib rub, chili spice, truffle butter, and popcorn salt tins. For something sweet, bag some Jack Daniel’s whiskey praline pecans at Write Selection or a Candy Corn’s pail pimping his alma mater and yumminess like chocolate peppermint popcorn.

North Star’s not enough guiding light? Check out ShopTalk for artsy bongs, plants with feet, sleeping bag suits, and other gift ideas for guys.

Photos: Courtesy of Index Skateboard Supply; Courtesy of Hadleigh’s; Courtesy of Deux: Courtesy of Candy Corn’s