Choose your words carefully this Christmas. May we suggest these trimmings to make your day merry and bright.

cornament
n. The sappy tree adornment commemorating an uninteresting achievement/year (i.e., completed sexual harassment training!).

deck the balls
v. To buy your hubby/boyfriend underwear for the holidays.

eggnod
n. The drowsiness that comes from drinking too much eggnog.

freestyle wrap
v. Using any means necessary to avoid buying another roll of wrapping paper you’ll have to store for a year.
(Charlie freestyle wrapped the engagement ring in a wool sock.)

holidate
n. The poor fool you trick into coming home with you to ease your parent’s scrutiny.

low elf-esteem
n. Self-doubt concerning your gift-giving abilities.
(After wrapping the vanilla-scented hand lotion, Jasmine’s elf-esteem sunk to new lows.)

For more word play, check out The DailyCandy Lexicon: Words That Don’t Exist but Should.

Photo: Pim Fijneman / Flickr