You like the sound of glowing skin, a flat stomach and a humming digestive system. It’s just the word colonic (and, um, everything it implies) that turns you off.

Opt for Urban Retreat’s new lava shell stomach massage to get the same effects, minus the awkwardness. Using heated tiger-striped clam shells and tropical-smelling oil, a therapist spends 45 minutes working on your stomach to release tension and blockages before finishing with a back massage.

The shells, which are imported from the Philippines, are self-heating (unlike regular hot stones). They also hold a healing blend of natural minerals, algae and dried sea kelp, so they act as more than just extensions of your masseuse’s hands.

Our therapist, Sophie, alternated the smooth, polished sides and narrow edges to lull us into relaxation and release emotional issues, old traumas and physical ailments that, she swears, reside in the colon. We left feeling physically lighter, clearheaded and with our dignity entirely intact.

Available at Urban Retreat at Harrods, 87-135 Brompton Road, fifth floor, SW1X 7XL (020 7893 8333 or urbanretreat.co.uk), £60.

Photo: Courtesy of Urban Retreat