Britney’s acne, Jordan’s implants, Chantelle’s hair extensions: three of the year’s biggest topics of conversation.

These are dark times we live in.

Further (not to mention far more interesting) testament to the trend for darkness: Dans Le Noir?, a new restaurant in which you eat in the pitch dark. The first DLN? opened in Paris last year and is full every night, so bagging a table at the London outpost might be hard. But once you do, here’s how it works: you order food on (visible) arrival before being led to your table by a partially-sighted or blind member of staff.

Sample unseen delights like Three Tastes of Salmon or tournedos with shallot mousseline and horseradish crisps. When you’ve come to your senses at the end of the meal, you can discuss the experience with fellow eaters-in-the-dark in a well-lit lounge. You’ll be surprised by all the new sensations that have been stirred up.

Which is, perhaps, more than you can say for your last few conversations.

Dans le Noir?, 30-31 Clerkenwell Green, EC1 (020 7253 1100 or danslenoir.com).