Romeo and Juliet enter centre stage.

Juliet: Wherefore art thou going, Romeo?

Romeo: To bed with thee.

Juliet: Hang about.

Romeo: Jest ye not; I’ve been hanging about for months. Tonight’s the night, fair Juliet.

Juliet: But I’ve a headache.

Romeo: Madam, I will have my way with you this very eve or else. And besides, when you see my snazzy new duvet cover, you’ll surely make an instant recovery.

Juliet: Why?

Romeo: ’Tis the coolest thing thou ever didst see. I am most pleased with it.

Juliet: Really, my lord?

Romeo: ’Tis the devilish illustration upon it. It speaks to my inner fetishist louder than any sonnet.

Juliet: What larks, fair Romeo! I always sensed you were a killer seducer. I’ll join thee right away. Shall I sport my leather thong?

Romeo: Thou art perfection, fair maid! How well thou knowest my hopes and dreams! Let us depart this instant.

The pair embrace in a passionate kiss, then exit.

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