Bikini Bottom 1: Nice fur trim.

Bikini Bottom 2: It’s neither mine nor, ahem, fur. My owner prefers going au naturel.

BB 1: She needs to take those thigh-burns to Stript Wax Bar, the luxe San Francisco salon that just opened an outpost on West Third Street.

BB 2: Do they slash and burn?

BB 1: Nope. Owner Katherine Goldman and her team are smooth operators. They use hard wax for a fast, clean job that keeps ingrowns at bay. Complimentary wine and numbing spray, Tempur-Pedic beds, and a glitzy interior (tufted leather couches, black crystal chandeliers) mean you almost forget your hirsute pursuit.

BB 2: I like what I’m hairing.

BB 1: For the boys, there’s the Brozilian. Goldman also offers the Vajacial, a facial that goes south of the border with a soothing enzyme mask, extractions, and a botanical lightening cream.

BB 2: Sounds downright vajuvenating.

Stript Wax Bar, 8218 West Third Street, between South Sweetzer and South La Jolla Avenues, West Hollywood (323-951-9517 or striptwaxbar.com), $10 and up.

Photo: Courtesy of Stript Wax Bar