Just Do It

maison 140 hotel!
Photos: Courtesy of Maison 140

Lately, the closest you’ve come to role-play is when the Mr. goes to the store for diapers. Treat yourself to a little fantasy at one of three bootylicious hotel rooms.

Sex on the Beach
Play Ken and Barbie for a night at the Malibu Beach Inn (22878 Pacific Coast Highway, Malibu; 310-456-6444). Request room 316 or suite 321 for sweeping ocean views. Nice packages (tee hee) include dinner or breakfast and are guaranteed to get you in the mood.

Voulez Vous?
Wednesday really is hump day at Maison 140 Beverly Hills (140 Lasky Drive; 310-281-4000). Check into a red-hot Mandarin room while sipping a complimentary glass of rosé. Then head downstairs to Bar Noir for Vin et Fromage, a weekly wine and cheese tasting featuring local vinos, 6-9 p.m.

Living in Oblivion
Knock back a pitcher of margaritas, then have a fling in suite uno at El Tres Inn (4439 West Sunset Boulevard; 323-666-6351). Located above El Chavo Restaurant, the three-room lodge recalls a swanky Mexico City bordello (purple-tiled bathrooms, black wallpaper). Pastries, fruit, and joe take the edge off the morning after.

You’ll be in and out.

Photo: Courtesy of Maison 140 Beverly Hills

This Week in Los Angeles

The Mini Social Warehouse Sale
What: Take up to 70 percent off designer kiddie clothing (Oeuf, Feather Baby), shoes (Smaller), toys, bedding, and more.
Why: You’re a social butterfly.
When: Sat., 9 a.m.-3 p.m.
Where: 120 E. Santa Anita Ave., b/t S. First St. & San Fernando Rd., Burbank.

Brazilian Jiu Jitsu
What: Cutting-edge martial art fosters confidence and a strong work ethic in kiddos.
Why: Let’s get physical.
When: Ongoing. Tues. & Thurs., 5:15-6:15 p.m.
Where: Robot Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, 11870 Santa Monica Blvd., b/t Bundy & Barrington Aves., West Los Angeles (310-979-9222).

Pumpkin Fair
What: Bouncies, carnival games, a haunted house, local grub, and more.
Why: You ain’t afraid of no ghosts.
When: Sat., 11 a.m.-9 p.m.
Where: Dixie Canyon Avenue School, 4220 Dixie Canyon Ave., b/t Ventura Blvd. & Moorpark St., Sherman Oaks (818-784-6283). Tickets available at thepumpkinfair.com.

Malibu Beach Inn
22878 Pacific Coast Hwy
off Sweetwater Canyon Dr
Malibu, CA 90265
El Tres Inn
4439 W Sunset Blvd
@ Hollywood Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90027
Robot Brazilian Jiu Jitsu
11870 Santa Monica Blvd
bt Bundy Dr & Barrington Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90025
Maison 140 Beverly Hills
140 Lasky Dr
bt Charleville & Santa Monica Blvds
Beverly Hills, CA 90212
The Mini Social Warehouse
120 E Santa Anita Ave
bt S First St & San Fernando Rd
Burbank, CA 91502