Gong with the Wind

feng shui!

If you’d only known Cousin Berta was a tiger and Aunt Sandra was a dragon, you’d never have sat -70 Uncle Brad in between them.

Next time, let Jennifer Bonetto chime in. Literally.

Trained in classical feng shui (the kind Chinese rulers used to build empires, not the common Black Hat Sect style used to support the plastic Buddha industry), Bonetto uses the floor plan of your house, its orientation, and the inhabitants’ birthdays and move-in date(s) to create an energetic blueprint by which wealth, health, and relationships can be guided.

In the event you’re unable to stop using your south-facing toilet or trade the gas stove for an electric double-burner, she has myriad easy ways to implement ideas and a website where you can nab the basics.

Use it wisely and you’ll be able to set the table for a most auspicious and harmonious feast.

Even if Uncle Brad’s a total pig.

Jennifer Bonetto (310-663-8238 or yoursoulutions.net).

Photo: Getty Images