Enter Sandman

DailyCandy Goes to the Beach

Listen up, beaches. Here’s your summer surf report:

Temperature: Hot (just guessing).

Atmosphere: Mellow.

Highs: Villa Malibu rentals.

Lows: In the ’70s — like your Hoki sandals.

Feels like: You could really go for a Godmother sub from Bay Cities Italian Deli & Bakery.

Sunrise: Better use protection.

Sunset: Burgers and pool at Hinano (15 Washington Boulevard, Venice; 310-822-3902).

Moonphase: Don’t think so; Rachel Pally’s new swimwear keeps that bum covered.

Precipitation: No, thanks.

Shade index: Hotel de Ville Vintage Eyewear (7422 Beverly Boulevard; 323-634-9911), a good book, and possibly a big straw hat.

Wind speed: Just enough for liftoff.

High tide: A game of Bananagrams on your stripey beach towel built-for-two.

Low tide: Swim, then stash wet suits in Lapin Vilardi’s bikini bag.

Swell: You can bet your Alexandra Cassaniti custom board on it.

Catch you later, Big Kahuna.