When we heard about the newest treatment to hit the beauty scene — the Cocktail Cure at Body Central — we knew what needed to be done.

We had to go out and get really plastered. (Oh, the things we do in the name of research!)

It wasn’t pretty. The next morning, as we dutifully dragged our pathetic, hungover selves to the spa and lay down on the table, we figured the best we could hope for was to get the room to stop spinning.

What followed was one of the more blissful combinations of Swedish massage, reflexology, and dry brushing — a treatment custom-designed to detoxify the lymph system, cleanse the body of impurities, and purportedly skedaddle fat cells. To us, it just felt darn good. How different it was from a regular old massage, we’re not entirely sure. But heck, it was worth it. We recommend it even for the die-hard teetotaler.

Because you shouldn’t have to get wasted in order to deserve some rehab.

Body Central, 99 University Place, between 11th and 12th Streets, fifth floor (212-677-5633).