1. “I love you” is a sentiment best expressed:
a) on a mix tape.
b) when drunk.
c) with the words I love you.
d) after the other person says it.

2. Commitment-phobic male : grown woman ::
a) catnip : cat (irresistible mood-altering drug)
b) kryptonite : Superman (ultimate weakening agent)
c) politically connected corporate defrauder : lame duck president (wrongdoer most likely to be pardoned)
d) all of the above

3. The preferred way to refer to an ex is:
a) not to refer to him/her at all.
b) by his/her first name.
c) by the phrase “that %#&^%.”
d) by the name of a film starring the unattractive actor he/she resembles most. (Example: “I can’t believe I used to date Moscow on the Hudson. What was I thinking?”)

4. Complete the following statement: Thank heaven for little boys …
a) … they grow up in the most delightful way.
b) … they look so jazzy in those Gap Kids ads.
c) … without them, where would Little League be?
d) … they grow up just enough to torture us with their indecision. Thanks a lot.

5. The best way to get answers to the above questions is:
a) ask your mom.
b) Friendster.
c) trial and error.
d) read Deanna Kizis’s delightful debut novel, How to Meet Cute Boys.

Answer key: D’s down the line.

As if you couldn’t figure that out, smarty-pants.

How to Meet Cute Boys is available online at amazon.com or at your local bookstore.