Pizza: Yo, Crepe, you crazy bastard. Who’s that cute galette in the kitchen?

Crepe: My cousin from Brittany, in Northern France. Same family tree, only she’s made with buckwheat, not flour.

Pizza: What’s she doing?

Crepe: Hanging with Fleur de Sel chef Cyril Renaud at his new spot, Bar Breton. They’re doing a French farmy theme — faux fireplace, communal table. Chef even got his parents to come over and paint.

Pizza: What’s with the fancy toppings?

Crepe: Spaghetti squash, sundried tomato pesto, cornichons, and radish sprouts? Crabmeat, apple, celery root, and almonds? That’s not how we serve it in my family.

Pizza: She’s got quite a shape. Slender thing. Rolled and sliced. Like Sushi Roll over there.

Crepe: Hey, quit drooling. She can be traditional, too (with eggs, ham, cheese).

Pizza: Mmm. I’d like to have her for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Bar Breton, 254 Fifth Avenue, between 28th and 29th Streets (212-213-4999). Open for breakfast today. Lunch starts Friday; dinner starts next week.