Hear ye, gather round the old town crier
Village idiots, antics, and sages.
Unwaged locals, bankers under fire
Ye may be broke, but ’tis not Dark Ages.

See ye not where ten golden coins suffice?
Recession’s lease hath all too short a date
Petraske’s perfect cocktails over ice.
Thou art now seven bucks and temperate.¹

Here are the treasures of thy lusty days
Bring round with you fun party elements
Kiosk’s yo-yo balloons earn thrifty praise
Staches to go for seven hundred cents.²

Sit prince-like on the rooftops of Fort Greene
Nine-dollar docs under the starry sky
On Sundays, half past six, you’re free to screen
Surf flicks at Tribeca Grand come July.³

Fine feasting doth come cheap on city streets
Tight gourmands chase the Rickshaw Dumpling Truck
Hark! Messenger birds update via Tweets
Feed thine own self on dumplings for nine bucks.

Music, culture, art go on a diet
So once again you can be filled with life
New Museum’s Button Retard Riot
Costs two bucks — not bad if thou hath strife.

¹ Recession Cocktail Hour, daily, 6-9 p.m., at White Star (21 Essex Street; 212-995-5464); daily, 7-10 p.m., at East Side Company Bar (49 Essex Street; 212-614-7408).
² Facial hair is more fun with friends at Annie’s Blue Ribbon General Store (365 State Street; 718-522-9848).
³ Popcorn included for all complimentary Sunday-night screenings at Tribeca Grand (2 Sixth Avenue; 212-519-6600).