Accordion lessons make us feel badass.

This was just one of the revelations we had in Walter Kuehr’s witty ephemera-packed LES shop, Main Squeeze.

Another? You’ll look like a 13-year-old boy trying to unhook a bra as Kuehr teaches the role of each hand, how to push, pull, and which buttons to press. Lessons begin with accordion basics, history, and culture (Kuehr played us tango, polka, tejano, and French cafe music), and include a flash course in musical basics (scales, bass, chords).

Serious and efficient, Kuehr doesn’t waste time, so expect to pump out a duet and improvised tune in your first sitting. He doles out both praise and honest criticism, so go prepared to concentrate and check your ego at the door.

An instrument is provided. However, if you — like us — lack the chops, check out the pros at Walter’s upcoming, two-band show.

Main Squeeze, 19 Essex Street, between Canal and Hester Streets (212-614-3109 or mainsqueeze-nyc.com). Lessons, $65. Show, February 13, 7 p.m., at Drom, 85 Avenue A, between 5th and 6th Streets (212-777-1157 or dromnyc.com). Tickets, $12 in advance; $15 at the door.

Photo: Ronen Goldman / Flickr