Getting blitzed on eggnog, wearing Christmas sweaters, hooking up at the office party.

You’re a sucker for holiday traditions.

Except when it comes to the tree. The sap. The hoisting. The dangerous drive home — one hand on the wheel, the other preventing the prickly thing from becoming roadkill.

Leave the dreaded task to Green Valley Christmas Trees, who delivers lush, full-bodied beauties that are harvested and shipped the same day from farms in North Carolina and Oregon.

You pick the type (white pine, noble or Fraser fir) and size (up to nine feet); Green Valley packs it in a protective, moisture-resistant carton with a predrilled trunk and removal bag. Shipping is free, and prices max out at less than $250 (believe it).

Secret Santas take orders until December 21, so there’s plenty of time for your favorite tradition …

Breaking out the balls.

Available online at greenvalleychristmastrees.com.

Photo: Courtesy of Getty Images