Itsy-Bitsy, Teeny-Weeny

Used to be that you looked in the mirror and saw a perfectly well-proportioned person.

And then the Brazilian bikini fad fell upon us. And everything came crashing down. Too little fabric down here, too much up there — it’s enough to make anyone lose perspective.

Enough with that train of thought, sister. You don’t need a new body, you need a customized bikini from Zoë. Stop in for a personal fitting and try on a variety of styles until you find one that suits. (She has quite the eye for a woman’s shape and can help you choose the most flattering style for, yes, even your body.) Zoë then takes your measurements and makes adjustment notes.

Keeping in mind your hair, eye, and skin color, she’ll help you pick out a fabric (more than 100 to choose from). If you insist on bringing your own (not encouraged), she’ll work with that, too. The cost? A mere $120.

A lot cheaper than getting a whole new body.

Zoë Custom Bikinis (415-250-1377 or zoebikini.com).