Skimpy bikinis. Excruciating waxes. Ass-kicking boot camps.

Without Brazilians, life would be a lot duller (and a lot less painful).

But there’s nothing but pure pleasure at Bossa Nova, the new SoMa hotspot.

Geometric cinder blocks and rough-hewn wooden doors with heart-shaped cutouts give the cozy 49-seater the look and feel of a Rio dance hall. Dim candelight and attractive staff in futbol tees and tube socks add to the allure.

Say muito obrigado to agave-sweetened caiphirinas and mojitos. If you can’t snag a seat, stand with a drink and get aperitivos (fried plantain chips, churrasquinho, hearts of palm salad) at the communal table. Rich and fragrant moqueca (traditional seafood stew) with a side of moist coconut rice is a gooool.

Live musicians and nightly DJs supply cool samba beats, so get ready to shake your bum-bum when the downstairs lounge opens in a few months.

And should you go topless, blame it on Rio.

Bossa Nova, 139 Eighth Street, at Minna Street (415-558-8008 or bossanovasf.com).