Not-So-Secret ’Stache

Hair ye, hair ye!

Hirsute members of society, we beseech you to use your wily whiskers for good by entering the annual Mustaches for Kids charity growing contest.

Let your brush grow wild in the name of Breakthrough Collaborative, a worthy nonprofit that increases educational opportunities for high-potential, low-income middle school students.

Clean Shave Day starts tomorrow: Participants shave their faces clean of burnsides, door knockers, and 5 o’clock shadows. All fuzz that does not grow above the upper lip must be removed weekly.

There will be voluntary follicle checkpoints over the course of the four-week competition and each grower must raise at least $50.

Ladies are encouraged to go wax free and lend their support in the form of cash and patience with scratchy handlebars.

What are you waiting for? Get growing.

For more info, go to m4ksf.org or e-mail
sweetstache@m4ksf.org to participate.