November 22, 2006

That’s the Ticket

BravoTix

Setting: San Francisco Opera House. Evening. Sounds of instruments tuning in preparation.

Cast: You, straight from work, seated in the orchestra section next to Snooty McSnotpants. Snooty hisses at you in a fake English accent.

Snooty: Excuse me, but what might you be doing in these seats?

You: I paid for them like you. Fifty bucks.

Snooty (choking): Did you say 50 dollars?

You: Yup. I got them through the Bravo Club.

Snooty: Bravo Club? What’s that?

You: It’s a cool group of — ahem — unstuffy, young arts enthusiasts. We get discounts on tickets, invites to parties, talks with behind-the scenes players, and special dinners with the stars. The best part is you don’t ever need a date, because there’ll always be someone you know. Oh, and at special events there’s even free champagne at intermission.

The curtain rises.

Snooty (loudly): Free champagne?

Snooty is shushed by the person next to her. You sit back and enjoy.

Bravo Club (415-565-3285 or sfopera.com).