Online - May 30, 2007

Because You’re Ugly

Jawbone Headset

Britney Spears was seen leaving Taco Bell wearing the new Jawbone, a bikini, and cowboy boots. She looked sexy. And by sexy, we mean like a pornographic Secret Service agent.

Brit was wearing the new Bluetooth headset to eliminate background noise. Why bother? She’s probably just calling FedEx to ask where she left her kids. She could be wearing an eye patch and singing, Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me, and this would make more sense.

The plastic is medical grade, and the fit is customizable, making the sleek earpiece lightweight and comfortable. Brit could wear it in silver, black, or red, but if she called, you’d still run screaming like the boogeyman was after you.

That reminds us of the time the boogeyman tried to attack us while we were saving children from a burning building.

We crushed him with our bare hands. True story.

Available online at jawbone.com or cingular.com.

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