Who’s the fairest of them all?

That’d be your belly, which hasn’t seen a ray of sun since last July. You blame the weather, but the true culprit is your ratty old two-piece, with its near sheer behind, frayed straps, and threadbare cups.

And a slight chance of water solubility.

A new Custo Barcelona bikini will spice up any seaside sashay. The Spanish line blends Latin pizazz with sophisticated European cuts — exposing just a peek of cheek and offering string or bandeau tops.

Mismatched prints, contrast trims, high-voltage colors, and abundant metallic fabrics ensure you’ll stand out like a beacon on the beach, instigating a chorus of muy caliente from onlookers.

Naturally, they’re not talking about the weather.

Available at Tininha’s Boutique, 617 North 35th Street (206-985-6772 or tininhasboutique.com); online at custo-barcelona-shop.com.