New Year’s resolutions may be the province of suckers, but you’ve set some goals: more op-ed, less gossip column. Oh, and no more biting your nails down to nubs.

This could require calling in the big guns.

Have Nail Taxi dispatch an experienced nail technician for an in-home (or office) manicure and pedicure. Armed with an array of colors by OPI and luscious foot scrubs — Chocolate Bliss Souffle is this winter’s signature service — these ladies will soften up tough feet and make your fingernails too pretty to nibble on.

Disposable liners are de rigueur in the foot tubs, and the Nail Taxi techs clean their tools with Barbicide, just like at the salon. So your nails will be as polished and professional looking as any starlet’s.

Who knows? With hands and feet now worthy of celebrity status, you might very well read about yourself in the “Reliable Source.”

There goes that other resolution.

Nail Taxi (800-290-1853 or nailtaxi.com).